Monday, November 29, 2010

Time to break out the big guns



So, our next move in the game of infertility has been made: I just scheduled an appointment with my RE to talk IVF. On December 30th. Only a month & a day from now.

I am scared shitless.

I honestly don't remember feeling this kind of fear. EVER. And I've done some pretty crazy/weird/daring stuff in my life by most peoples' standards.

But IVF, man, that's a big, expensive step. And also very final. Because if it doesn't work & if any embryos we may get from FETs fail, then we have no other options to have biological children. I don't plan on doing IVF more than once or twice @ the most.

There is, of course, always adoption. And even though I'm fine with that, my husband is not. At least not right now; I've been working on it but also don't want to push it. He's just as scared of IVF not working as I am. Perhaps even more so.

So, here we go. Hopefully I don't self sabotage & end up gaining back all the weight I've lost with holiday goodies. Looking @ my cycles (still as reliable as ever) I should be on about CD10 or so for my consult which means I'll be getting AF near Vid's birthday on January 14th (no birthday luvin' for him; oh well) & we may be cycling for IVF as soon as then. That's only 6 weeks away.

Wow.

2 comments:

Heather Cara said...

We'll be on similar paths around similar times. Best of luck!!

Kate said...

I wish you both the very best of luck! It is super scary to take the first step, we had one shot, but it wasn't as bad as I imagined it would be. It's no cake walk, but you can definitely do it. I feel ya on the no birthday lovin, S's was last week and Dr's orders. But it's for a good cause. ;)