Saturday, February 25, 2012

Yup, we've done that.

Wish I could say this was my ingenious idea but it's not; it was posted on an infertility board I frequent & thought it was too good not to share:

Monday, February 20, 2012

Fucking fertiles!

The scene: a local pizza place a couple nights ago.  I'm picking up our order (their 2 large cheese deal) on our way to my parents' house.  We'll have dinner & then it's off to the hockey game...

Me (to lady behind counter): Hi.  Picking up for Anasara; 2 large cheese.

Dude waiting @ counter next to me: Only 2?  Man you're lucky.  I have 5 kids; so expensive!  Don't have a big family.

Me: Don't worry; I can't because I'm infertile.

Dude: Just do IVF or something then.

Me: I did but didn't work.  IVF's not a guarantee.  Be greatful for what you have.  I'd love to have the expense of a kid rather than a hospital bill for a failed IVF. (I pay for our food & leave)

Dude: Well, have a nice night.

Fucking fertiles!

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Happy Valentine's Day I guess...

I POAS (FRER to be exact) with FMU yesterday @ 9dp3dt.  BFN.  Meh.  Not surprised @ all.  I know beta isn't until Thursday (12dp3dt) but I'm officially calling it.  Since I have class tonight Vid & I will be celebrating Valentine's Day tomorrow evening with dinner courtesy of a Groupon I bought months ago.  I will be drinking a glass of red wine without guilt & am saving room for dessert.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

IVF does not stand for "I'm very fertile"

I went to BJ's Wholesale club to pick up some stuff with my mom.  Among the items I purchased is the jumbo pack of Tampax you see above.  It's soooo much cheaper to purchase 1 or 2 giant boxes a year @ BJ's rather than a drug store.  Plus, I had a BJ's coupon & a manufacturer's coupon (woot!).  My mom commented on my purchase since I'm currently in infertile hell (a.k.a. "the 2 week wait") & I had to remind her IVF does stand for "I'm very fertile" so I'd rather be safe than sorry since I only had like 3 tampons left @ home.  Still haven't decided if I'm going to pee on things before beta or not.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

And now, we wait...

The Lone Ranger was transfered @ about 10am this morning.  Beta is 2/16; not sure if I will pee on something before then.  S/he was 7 cells with minimal fragmentation.  The RE who did the transfer was the idiot who told me to "just lose weight" & I'd get pregnant.  It was kind of vindicating to see him again & know he's now aware that it's my shitty ovaries that don't make eggs which have been the problem & not my love of carbs.  He gave us the petri dish where TLR came into being.  Hopefully we can put that in a baby book this fall. 

Friday, February 3, 2012


Of the 5 egss that were retrieved, 2 were mature & 1 fertilized.  One.  Uno.  Une.  Onnu.  Dhaya.  Uma.  Wahed.  Ek.  Ichi.


So, obviously we have nothing to freeze, which completely freaks me out.  I had banked (yeah, I know, stupid) on having a frostie or 2 as a fall back if this didn't work.  Now, I don't know what we'll do if this turns out to be a BFFN negative like every other cycle.  I suppose we could do another IVF but if we did I would DEMAND a change in protocol.  I've been told over & over again "I'm young" so WTF did I respond so poorly?  I'm still shocked by how this turned out. 

But, we do have 1.  And 1 is all it takes, right?  God, I hope so.  When I called for a status report earlier this afternoon the embryologist said The Lone Ranger was "4 cells & doing exactly what it was supposed to".  "Quality over quantity", I keep telling myself.  So we'll be going in @ 9am for transfer tomorrow morning & the beginning of 2 weeks of neuroses on my part.

Wednesday, February 1, 2012


My ER this morning went ok.  Well, it went ok as in they were able to easily access my ovaries & I came out of anasthesia just fine.  However, out of my 12 follies that measured 16+ as of Monday's u/s, they only got 5 eggs; over half of my follies were empty.  I was expecting more eggs obviously, but @ the same time I'm thinking we may have finally answered (in part @ least) why nothing has worked for us so far.  I've had 8 IUIs & no BFPs.  It is quite possible my "beautiful" follies (2-3 each cycle) probably contained no eggs.  Knowledge is power & I've been suspicious of "empty follicle syndrome" for a while to be honest.  Of course I was hoping to have something to celebrate on my 4th wedding anniversary, but it is what it is.  I'm just hoping we get something to transfer of decent quality.  I know it only takes one, but this is not what I expected at all.  I've been instructed to start Crinone once a day tomorrow morning (good gooey times!) & call the embryologist for a fert report in the afternoon.