Wednesday, November 3, 2010

A book about infertility I didn't know was about infertility


I've been meaning to read "The Kite Runner" for quite sometime but just never got around to it. There isn't much time for leisure reading when taking night classes & working full time. I tend to gravitate towards books about far away lands & cultures; I guess I'll always be an anthropologist at heart.

I knew it was about an Afghani boy who eventually comes to the US but that was about it. What I didn't know was the central character in the book ends up marrying a woman & when they TTC they end up diagnosed with unexplained infertility. And after a long, arduous journey back to Afghanistan, he (the main character) ends up finding his long lost half-brother's son in an orphanage; his half-brother's family, save for his son, had all been killed by the Taliban. He ends up bringing him back to the US & adopting him even though adoption is very taboo in Afghanistan, much like it is in India.

I brought this up the other day to my therapist; she herself had not read the book but was intrigued. She knows how resistant my husband is to adoption & suggested perhaps getting him to read the book too. I told her I'd try but unless it has to do with ridiculously difficult math or military history I doubt he'd be interested. We'll see. In the meantime, she is trying to find an Indian couple who have adopted from her friends in various adoption agencies for Vid to talk with because I think that's the only way he'll come around on the adoption issue.

By the way, we still plan on trying IVF, but if it doesn't work, I cannot imagine my life childless. I've always been open to adoption but honestly didn't think I'd have to have such a conversation about what to do if we can't get pregnant. I never thought we'd be in this situation & really, unless & until we've exhausted all of our biological resources, I don't think adoption is even on Vid's radar. To me, a child is a child & I just want to be someone's mommy.

1 comment:

~M~ said...

I hope you're not upset, but a new ezine for South Asian moms recently published an article about our adoption journey (I'm white, DH is Pakistani) and I thought maybe you'd like to see it. I know I'm often looking to hear stories from couples sort of similar to us...

I was trying to figure out a post that was at least somewhat relevant to share the link ... so I chose this one. I've been reading your blog for a long time, and all I can really offer are some virtual hugs...
(I can't seem to make the link clicky, so I bitly'd it)