Sunday, September 23, 2012

Finding (my) Nemo

My WTF was rescheduled due to the fact my RE spaced out about the Jewish high holy days.  My RE is Hindu but about as observant as my husband (meaning she also eats beef, lol) but her DH is Jewish so they celebrate 2 sets of holidays in their house like we do (Catholic & Hondu).  She was very apologetic but really, what's another 2 weeks in the grand scheme of things?  Especially since we're not cycling again for another few months.

So yeah, we decided on moving ahead with IVF #3 & saving our frosty.  Even if we get lucky & the 3rd time really is the charm, he/she will be given a shot @ life down the road.  Although I've bargained myself down to "just 1" with God (who apparently doesn't even want to give me that) I'll use however many frosties I may end up with, even if it's something redonk like 5.  It's just my personal belief that they should be given the chance to turn into humans; if you diasgree, that's your choice.  Not that I have any real hope of getting that many anyways, but I digress...

Speaking of my lone frosty, I decided to watch "Finding Nemo" late last night because I was in a foul mood thanks to being crampy (AF arrived today) & out of my fave wine which my husband did not tell me he finished (yes, I let him live).  The seagulls kill me!  Surely, this will make me feel better, right?  Except I forgot about the 1st scene:



*cue tears*

That one little egg is much like my one little frosty.  The hope which is contained in something so small means more than anything in the world to me right now.  And I'm so scared of losing him/her.  As long as he/she is frozen, I have hope.  After 4 years & numerous failed treatment cycles, I really don't have much hope left.  Except for my Nemo.  Please, God, let my frosty become a child some day.


4 comments:

kthappy76 said...

((hugs)) *cue more tears*. I thought of your last post when I read the latest this morning about the baby panda in DC. :'(. It just shouldn't be so hard.

Rebecca said...

Really hoping that you'll get many more frosties to put with the single one you currently have.

ADSchill said...

I hear you. I felt that way about my frosties and about my lone embie that I transfered. They all deserve a chance and I think you do too. I pray this next IVF is your chance.

Anasara said...

KT, I only found out about the baby panda death after you commented on here. So sad.